{"id":2142,"date":"2026-01-03T22:12:58","date_gmt":"2026-01-03T22:12:58","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/epub-book.com\/download\/bits-of-cargill-cargill-michael\/"},"modified":"2026-01-03T22:12:58","modified_gmt":"2026-01-03T22:12:58","slug":"bits-of-cargill-cargill-michael","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/epub-book.com\/download\/bits-of-cargill-cargill-michael\/","title":{"rendered":"Bits of Cargill – Cargill, Michael"},"content":{"rendered":"
\n

Book Preview<\/h3>\n

Diary of Dork –
\nArticles of Sarcasm and Irreverence<\/p>\n

Slaughter in
\nBarnaby Close<\/p>\n

Email –
\nmcargill79@gmail.com<\/p>\n

Twitter –
\n@MichaelCargill1<\/p>\n

http:\/\/www.facebook.com\/MichaelCargillAuthor<\/span><\/p>\n

Website of
\nsatire – http:\/\/michaelcargill.wordpress.com\/<\/span><\/p>\n

Published by
\nMichael Cargill at Smashwords<\/p>\n

Copyright 2012
\nMichael Cargill<\/p>\n

Note to
\nlawyers, and litigious types: this is all satire\/parody\/not
\nactually real. I\u2019m sure that Steve Jobs, Saddam Hussein, and
\neveryone else are very nice people really.<\/p>\n

Hi, my name is
\nGeoff, and I\u2019m rather fond of my name, as it\u2019s unique. There aren\u2019t
\nmany people out there with the same name as me, and that makes me
\nfeel special, and mentally empowered. I haven\u2019t ever met a girl
\ncalled \u2018Geoff\u2019, so that\u2019s already fifty percent of the world\u2019s
\npopulation that can be ruled out. If my name was Pascal, I would
\nprobably commit suicide.<\/p>\n

Back when I was
\nyounger, I was in the garden making sandcastles out of mud, when I
\nsaw a frog hop past. I had never been so close to a frog before, so
\nI ran away, just in case it tried to trick me into licking it. The
\nnext day the frog was gone, and the rain had washed away my
\nsandcastles. This all happened back in the days when my next door
\nneighbour still had a cat.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n

\n

Read the full book by downloading it below.<\/p>\n

DOWNLOAD EPUB<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Book Preview Diary of Dork – Articles of Sarcasm and Irreverence Slaughter in Barnaby Close Email – mcargill79@gmail.com Twitter – @MichaelCargill1 http:\/\/www.facebook.com\/MichaelCargillAuthor Website of satire – http:\/\/michaelcargill.wordpress.com\/ Published by Michael Cargill at Smashwords Copyright 2012 Michael Cargill Note to lawyers, and litigious types: this is all satire\/parody\/not actually real. I\u2019m sure that Steve Jobs, Saddam … Read more<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":2141,"comment_status":"","ping_status":"","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[126],"class_list":["post-2142","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-uncategorized","tag-michael-cargill"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/epub-book.com\/download\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2142","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/epub-book.com\/download\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/epub-book.com\/download\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/epub-book.com\/download\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/epub-book.com\/download\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2142"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/epub-book.com\/download\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2142\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/epub-book.com\/download\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/2141"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/epub-book.com\/download\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2142"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/epub-book.com\/download\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2142"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/epub-book.com\/download\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2142"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}